4 steps for more self-esteem

Updated: Jun 17, 2020

SELF-FEELING means being attentive to how you feel. Identify what you feel, without judging whether it is good or not to feel such emotion when faced with such a situation.

1- recognize your worth

SELF-FEELING means being attentive to how you feel. Identify what you feel, without judging whether it is good or not to feel such emotion when faced with such a situation.

Just recognize and let be.

Often we leave it up to others to decide how we should feel or what is good for us.

When they say we are bad then we believe them. We feel bad, and we think that is a sign that they are right.

When they tell us that things are our fault then we believe them.

The idea is not to ignore what others tell us, but not to let their words decide for us.

To honor what feels right, the path we feel ours.

This is the most important first step towards self-esteem.

Esteem and honor your intuition.

Developing self-esteem, therefore, involves honoring oneself through our words, our actions, and our attitude.

Having self-esteem means recognizing that we did the best we could at the time, even if tomorrow our vision will change on the way we acted.

Having self-esteem will not happen tomorrow when you are perfect.
It will happen when you fully accept who you are, in your pure authenticity.
In your difficulties, your mistakes, your incapacities sometimes it involves accepting to look at who you really are and to do things from where you are.

You have value, simply because you are alive.

You are a valuable person.

Your value does not depend on your actions or the opinion of others, your value is constant and inherent.

To recognize it is to give it all the space to bring out the energy that gives life to potential!

Take the time this week to write down in your notebook 3 moments of your day when you felt your worth.

2-Regain your freedom through forgiveness

The way others treat us is often a reflection of the way we treat each other.

If one does not estimate its value, the others do not estimate our value.

Everything always starts with you.

This is reassuring, because it does not depend on luck or an external force but only on the look and the words that we put on us.

When we are faced with people who do not respect us, it is often that they themselves do not respect themselves.

They usually can't see their own size, so it's impossible for them to see yours.

A great way to transform this energy is to make it clear how you want to be treated.

For example, in my situation,

I was devalued, I was accused of incompetence and theft, I was lied not to pay myself.

My request is, therefore:

I decide to work with people who recognize the true value of my work, who encourage and support me.

I decide that the quality of my work and my skills are appreciated and recognized

I decide to work with people I trust who trust me.

May these people be kind.

And I decide to get paid the agreed price on time.

You can never, despite all the efforts of the world, make yourself loved by someone who does not love himself.

The only way to feel good and free from these people is to forgive them. This will allow you to release any anger and be able to focus your energy again on other things, on what is important to you.

Forgive, and move on.

Each situation we face is an opportunity created by our inner guide to allow us to gain strength and power.

By forgiving you take back your power, you decide how you want to feel, who you want to be, and where you want to go, free from this burden that does not serve your accomplishment.

3- Detach from the validation of others

Sometimes we give a lot, we fully honor others and we have the feeling that we receive little or nothing in return.

It’s frustrating because we don’t understand why and it seems unfair.

The first question to ask is: do I really feel that I really deserve to receive this recognition, do I feel that I should be treated well? Or do I let others take my kindness and dedication for granted?

THE BIG challenge is to succeed in respecting yourself, even when others do not respect us.


step 1 - Forgive them.

Step 2 - Drop any need to receive validation for anything.

When you expect others to appreciate you, understand you, or validate your choices, you are stripping yourself of your power.

Obviously it's very nice to receive recognition from others.

However, if you want to develop your inner freedom and your strength it is essential that the validation of others is not an essential need to believe in yourself.

When you feel that your self-confidence or your project falters, or depends heavily on others then try this little exercise:

Take a sheet of paper and note your want

EX: "I want to create my podcast to help as many people as possible to progress more serenely in their projects."

What are all the reasons (at least 12) why it is absolutely possible for you to succeed? Reasons you truly believe.

. I write quickly

. I like to work with my voice

. I have valuable content thanks to my years of experience

. I’ve already helped a lot of people in personal sessions so I can do it in podcasts too

Once this list is written, phrase your decision.

"I'm creating my podcast. My podcast helps as many people as possible to move forward serenely in their projects."

And with this decision, take action.

Whenever you have the slightest doubt, take this list and read it, to remind you of all your reasons why you can absolutely believe in yourself.

In this way, you create your own truth. The one that is unique and that will allow you to advance in your unique mission.

Because listening to the truth of others distracts you from your path.

We all have a truth of our own.

Our job is to listen to it and to move forward guided by this truth.

The visions of others are also true but for their own way.

Being able to Differentiate your truth from their truth, is taking the path of autonomy.

4- Visualize the wonderful person you are.

As you may have noticed, I give a lot of little visual creative exercises.

Because it is indeed a wonderful way to think in a playful way about our ideal vision and to have it gently accepted by our unconscious thanks to the repetition of the number of times when you go to watch this work!

I’ve seen quite a few people make a vision board and put it on their computer desk.

I find the idea interesting since we spend a lot of time on our computer ...

And nothing prevents you from having two vision boards, one digital and one paper.

In short, the idea linked to this theme is to choose images, photos of you, words of the drawings which reflect aspects that you like about yourself, of which you are proud but also of what is an inherent part of your value.

Why do you deserve respect, esteem, love?

And why not also help someone you know make a vision board?

Being there for someone who needs guidance, or encouragement.

Receiving their recognition, seeing them develop, gaining self-confidence, can bring you enormous joy, and boost your self-esteem.

Sometimes helping others to develop what you need to develop yourself generates a win-win!

Then if you are not someone visual but the words surround you and make you vibrate, then why not write a text with your effigy.

Describing the wonderful person you are?

You can use the You or the I, whatever, you can write a poem, a dialogue, a formal text, whatever. Have fun with words.

You can do this exercise with friends, with your partner, and reading your text to each other!

You can even go further in the exercise and each, in turn, write a text for the other.

That will make two texts of praise that you can read and reread at your leisure, they will be the beginning of your gold book, the one where you will write this week, (and all your life why not?), congratulations, a recognition that you've received.

Each day, your job will be to count them and express your recognition a few times once a day.

In any moment of doubt, fear, loss of confidence, this book will be your light, your memory, the voice of your soul ...

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